Meeting Your Own Needs.
We all want our needs met.
When we prioritise our needs, we can take our team to the next level.
In the 1940s, psychologist Abraham Maslow proposed that to reach self-actualisation, the following needs had to be met first:
Physiological needs (such as food and clothing)
Safety and security (such as a steady job and a roof over our heads)
Love and belonging (such as respectful relationships and friendships)
Self esteem (agency, autonomy and confidence in one's worth)
This is called Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. The Hierarchy of Needs dictates that when we have our core needs met, we can focus on actualisation. Actualisation is where achievement lives. It’s the juice of high performance in any category.
We know that self-actualisation (results) can only be achieved when we have our needs met. We also know that we can’t expect to produce ‘high performers’ when they don’t have their core needs met (safety, security, belonging). It’s a bit like having a leaky boat and wondering why you can’t paddle to shore.
We all crave to have our own needs met.
Great workplaces really dive deep into these needs. You're not losing power by communicating differently from a place of what that person can gain. Instead, you're helping the person you lead gain power and autonomy. If you want the people you’re around to take ownership, complete tasks of their own volition and achieve more, you have to make it clear what’s in it for them.
The leaders I support are experts in knowing what they want. What I help them work on is communicating what they need. This clarity is the difference between having a team and knowing how to get the most out of them. Here is one of the exercises I teach in Leadership Mastermind, which asks you to reflect on your needs. Let’s dive in.
What is a non-negotiable in your day?
When I teach this exercise in workplaces, people often say coffee is a non-negotiable. Being outside. Exercise. Time with their favourite show. Switching off and having time for the kids. These are all examples of non-negotiables.
What could yours look like?
For me, a good day and non-negotiable is knowing that my team is clear on what their focuses are. Knowing that my partner feels loved and connected. Having quality coffee and alone time. Having pride in what I contribute. These are non-negotiable for me.
How do you prioritise your needs?
I do this exercise in my coaching sessions and I am always interested in the results. There’s no right or wrong way to organise our needs, but it is a helpful reflection to ponder.
Am I giving enough attention to what I want more of? Is there an opportunity to reflect on where my team's needs fit into the equation, so I can get the results I'm here to get? In my life, I have made the choice to prioritise:
My needs.
My spouse's needs.
My team's needs.
The needs of the business I own, Happiness Concierge.
Family and friends.
What I notice about this list is that the order evolves over time, just as I do. When something doesn’t feel quite right, I find this exercise very helpful to align my priorities and meet the needs of my work and those I care about.
What are your team's non-negotiables?
It’s easy to forget your team has core needs to be met each day, when you’re in the day to day, isn’t it? This is a helpful exercise as, if and when your team is performing out of sync or unusually, it’ll be because they haven’t met a need that may be within their control.
If you know what great looks like with their needs met, it's easy to spot when things aren't going so well or they need some TLC.
For example, do they seem distracted or on the verge of tears? Is their thinking face a frown or is something bothering them? Have they missed a chance to meet their personal commitments before arriving at work or are they just under the pump?
Instead of assuming what our team needs, we can ask instead: What do you need from me?
Our teams have their own non-negotiables, whether that's been communicated [to us] or not. Posing the question to your team, ‘What are your non-negotiables every day?’ is a superb place to start. I bet you’ll learn something new and chances are they’ll love to think about it.
Do I know what ‘done’ looks like?
I remember so vividly a team member saying to me, “What does done look like with this project?” And I had to gulp as I thought “What does that look like? Things are never done!”
That was because I had my entrepreneur hat, my leader hat on. I wasn't stepping into the shoes of the team member. Since then, I started to ask what ‘done’ looked like and created boundaries in my business for jobs, for clients and most importantly for my team, so they knew when to stop, celebrate and what to aim towards.
Bringing it all together.
I share this great template from Leadership Mastermind, which helps you be really clear with your team on what the need-to-do vs nice-to-do looks like, so everyone knows where to direct their energy each week.
It asks:
What is the need-to-do?
What is the nice-to-do?
What does done look like this week/today?
What small wins will we be able to celebrate?
These four questions focus our attention on the deal breakers of results each week. If your team is not used to meeting their own needs, this will give them a laser focus, too. It has also helped me so much as a leader and entrepreneur, as I am encouraged to focus on one thing at a time.
Meeting your needs and your team's needs doesn’t need to be time intensive, but it does need to be prioritised for you to be effective.
Reflecting on this, what would you say could be an opportunity for your leadership?