YOU wiLl LEARN
In this course, you’ll learn how to rebuild a fractured relationship.
You’ll learn:
The 3D’s of relationships.
The 5 steps to repair.
Planning a restorative conversation.
Creating safety in yourself.
KEY CONCEPTS
The 3D’s of relationships.
What stage is your relationship at?
Is your relationship experiencing:
A simple disagreement?
Doubt in the other person's intent or capabilities?
Damage in trust?
Use the guide in your workbook and video to identify what stage your relationship is at.
By identifying where you see the relationship, you can understand whether it’s safe to proceed with a conversation, or whether the better move is to prioritise your wellbeing and get support (or space from them).
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The 5 steps to repair.
By identifying what an ideal scenario would look like, you clear the way to repair the relationship.
Map out the answers in your workbook and video guide, to decide the path forward.
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Planning a restorative conversation.
The six principles to a conversation going well are:
Focus on the end goal.
Outline how you can both get your needs met.
Stay cool (breathe - yellow/green).
Stop talking (80% listen, 20% talk).
Call out their fears.
Set your limits to the conversation.
Step through the video and workbook to decipher how you can plan your conversation.
If you decide to proceed, this video also includes tips on having the conversation and preparing what you’ll say.
If you’d like further guidance on how to have a constructive conversation, check out this short Giving & Receiving Feedback course.
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Creating safety in yourself.
If you don’t feel safe at work, it’s not safe to have a conversation.
So how can you repair?
By focussing on ways to ‘circuit break’ the intensity of the emotion you’re feeling, you’re able to physiologically alter your body and brain chemistry.
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The impact? Feeling like you have more space to process what’s happening.
In this workbook, step through our popular ‘Traffic Light Framework’, which we use to identify what stage you might be in.
In the green, you are safe and ready to have a conversation.
In the yellow, you might be on the edge of your comfort zone and be uncertain.
In the red, you might not feel safe or comfortable at work or the person you’ve got a fractured relationship with.
If you find yourself in the red, which is very normal when relationships are fractured, you’ll benefit from a ‘circuit breaker’.
A circuit breaker is any action that helps your mind and body reset from the stress of not feeling safe. Here are 6 evidence-based examples of ways you can reset:
Deep breathing: calms our stress responses.
Exercise: doesn’t need to be a marathon, can just be a walk around the block
Creativity: studies have shown it calms our minds down.
Positive social interaction: reminding yourself you have a community of friends and chosen family that are not in this work situation.
Belly laughter: not polite laughter, the crying laughter you only get when you have a laugh with a good friend or see a funny meme or movie.
Physical affection: fun fact, a 20 second hug is shown to produce our feel good’ love’ hormone, oxytocin.
Take a look at the framework in the workbook. What scenario seems most suited to where you’re at?