THANKS FOR COMING TO THE HAPPINESS CONCIERGE TRAINING!
Andrea Clarke, Founder CEO of Career
Superstar Fiona Kerslake
Superstar Sue Keay
Connect, Then Lead - Harvard Business Review
"When they go low, we go high" - Speech Democratic Convention reference
L-R: Susan Cain, Author Quiet Carla Harris, Vice chairman, managing director, and senior client adviser, Morgan Stanley, Elaine Welteroth, youngest ever, second ever African American editor of a Conde Nast title (Teen Vogue), Yassmin Abdel-Magied, Engineer and Author.
The More You Energize Your Coworkers, the Better Everyone Performs Harvard Business Review
FURTHER RESOURCES:
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View the presentation as a PDF | View the worksheets as a PDF
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STUDIES / ARTICLES REFERENCED
The Strength of Weak Ties, Mark S. Granovetter, American Journal of Sociology, Volume 78, Issue 6 (May 1973), 1360-1380
Proof That Positive Work Cultures Are More Productive By Emma Seppala and Kim Cameron, Harvard Business Review, December 01, 2015
Connect, Then Lead: To exert influence, you must balance competence with warmth. Harvard Business Review, July - August 2013 by Amy J.C. Cuddy, Matthew Kohut, and John Neffinge
Print version including examples of body language and warmth
Charles Duhigg, The Power of Habit Reading List
Susan Cain, Author Quiet Bestseller, The New York Times, Featured Speaker TED 2012, Cover Story TIME Excerpt
Carla Harris, Vice chairman, managing director, and senior client adviser, Morgan Stanley.
![Nawwww… awesome group of future leaders today in #melbourne!
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Our brief was to help them nail the skills to get noticed, gain credibility within an organisation and learn the skills required for managing more responsibility.
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The AHA moments came with role plays on constructive conversations, focussed on giving feedback upwards as well as sideways and downwards. They were asked to address one of three examples: •Your direct report is rolling your eyes in your WIPs.
•Your boss delivers a report to the LT using your insights. They add their insights, which contradicts yours and as a result it sends the wrong message.
•Your team member requests a meeting, then dials in 30 mins late
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The rule was to use the HC framework: I’ve noticed… the impact was…. ask the person for their take. Have a conversation and get more info. Then, move to a recommendation or suggestion. Example: I’ve noticed you took a call yesterday when we were talking about X. It makes me wonder whether you’re taking what I’m saying seriously.” Then, PAUSE. “What was your take?” That person might share an urgent call, maybe their bosses boss was calling, maybe there was a window to take a VIP call. Maybe … fuck knows. The point is you don’t know unless you ask.
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The idea of pausing and seeking a response is when you share something you’ve noticed, and the impact it has, it opens a CONVERSATION. So many of us (myself included), worry about saying the wrong thing, so we say all of the things, and as a result, it’s an annoyed, unclear, passive aggressive, indirect ramble. By sharing “So I’ve noticed when I X, you do X, which gives the impression X. What do you think?” it helps open a convo, and from there we can learn a ton of stuff about what’s going on for our team / colleague / boss, which could help us realise what else is going on for them.
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“How did we find this exercise?” I asked. “It was hard”, said one. “I found myself waiting for them to finish so I could get more annoyed.” Another said “it was really insightful. It turned out they [in this fictitious role play] had to take an urgent call from my bosses boss so we both agreed it was the right response.”](https://static1.squarespace.com/static/551655bce4b0ae548a7bc945/5a9f6b314c0dbf6752292d16/5ad8c2a2ed62fefaa9209433/1524155084793/)
