WELCOME TO MOJO SCHOOL!
SQUEE! I am so excited you are here! Yay.
Every week you will receive an email and how to video outlining one small task to build your mojo each week. This info will also be shared in on this private page for Mojo School students, so you can refer back to this page at any time.
Before you start
Nominate a Mojo School Sponsor who is going to keep you accountable and someone who you'd like to share the progress with. Join the HC Slack Community Channel (Rach has sent you a link to join) where we've got a private Mojo School thread to chat about each task!
Ok, let's get to it!
Week One: Achievement Audit
This week we articulate your amazing achievements to date so you can pat yourself on the back and fill up the well.
Why? Well, confidence is built through celebrating small wins. This tricks our brain into associating doing new things with a positive reward system, meaning our brain starts craving momentum, to feel that again.
You see: brain gets tired. Brain gets full. Brain takes for granted the things we can do easily. (Because when you've been doing something for a little while, what was once challenging has now become habit and it now feels easy. We tend to value things that come easy to us, when in fact, the things we find 'easy' are usually the things we're really good at and then take for granted and therefore undervalue).
Soooo... when someone asks us what we've been up to, we mumble and say 'nothing much' and sooner or later, we start to believe we actually haven't done anything at all. And this only contributes to feeling flat.
It can be easy to forget how awesome you are when the great things you do go by without documenting them, or celebrating them!
So this weeks task is dedicating to taking stock of everything you have achieved so you have it on the record. When you're feeling not so ace, you can refer back to this worksheet to remind yourself of how awesome you really are.
Write down the accomplishments you have achieved - big and small, work and personal, in 2017 - and in 2018. For some of you this will come easy, for others, simply writing down what you have achieved can be an awesome confidence booster.
Then, outline how it felt and what the lessons were for you. Do this for both 2018 and 2017, covering personal life, work, health and relationships. Here is the how to video:
Week Two: What do I actually want?
Approximately 80% people who attend Happiness Concierge workshops say they don't know the answer to this (yet). So how can we ask for the promotion / life / job / relationships of our dreams if we don't know what we really, really want?
This week we are going to sit down and nut out: what do I want to FEEL, HAVE and ACHIEVE this year. I'll ask you to write down the answers to these three questions:
- How do I want to feel this year?
- What do I want to have?
- What do I want to achieve?
Do this a few times until you write without limitations. (For me I had to do this exercise FIVE times before I started to dream big, as opposed to what I thought others would expect of me).
Once your list excites you, revisit it. Ask yourself, and ask someone who wants to see you succeed if it helps: what is the smallest stepping stone I could take to make this happen?
For example, if your goal is to stop crying at work, could getting more sleep be a priority? If saying no to clients is a goal, could you practice a role play with your accountability buddy to build up your confidence? If launching your own business is a goal, could you sign up for a free website template to play around with some ideas? If getting fit is a priority, could you perhaps do a little research to see what gyms have free trials and sign up for ONE?
And then: I want you to tell your Mojo School accountability sponsor what's on your list. Why? Studies tell us that making ourselves accountable by writing it down, saying it out loud to someone we admire and respect - AND providing regular updates to said rockstar influences the likelihood of us achieving our goals to nearly 70%.
I created this list when I returned from my Beyoncé concert in New York and knew I wanted something different: I just didn't know what that was, exactly. Once I got honest with myself and told someone I respected about it: I was forced into constructive action.
"Something is better than nothing Rachie", Dad said to me after one of my breakdowns. I can't wait to see what small step YOU are going to take this year.
Week Three: People Audit
This weeks tool is about identifying who supports you, who teaches you, who inspires you and who is plain fun to be around.
The goal of this exercise isn't to make big changes, rather to create awareness of how frequently you may be seeing people who can bring out the best you, the real you and the most excellent you that feels good about themselves.
I first created this tool when I was feeling not fab in a relationship. I felt frazzled, tired and flat and I wanted to create a 'short list' of people I could call upon to help me build my mojo and confidence back up.
I created four columns:
- They support me
- They inspire me
- They teach me
- They are plain fun to be around
The interesting thing that emerged from this exercise was that, when I filled in the above four columns, some of the names of people who were playing a starring role in my life didn't appear in any of the four boxes. Eeep.
From there, I thought about how I could make small changes to
A. see those who didn't make any of the boxes less frequently
B. how to see more of the people who did inspire, teach, support me or who were plain fun to be around MORE OFTEN.
It turned out for me, many of the people who supported me I'd actually been a bit of a crap friend letting work take over and by reaching out to them to apologise and ask them out to dinner, we were able to get back to making mojo together. For others, it was reaching out and saying 'I miss you! Can we Skype?'. And surely, but slowly, I started to build my mojo back up and identify more strongly when someone I was with was zapping my energy.
For you this week: take yourself out for a coffee / drink / bath / time out / before bed - and map out the four columns. Who's rocking your wonderful self? Who loves your weird, wild and real you side? Who wants you to succeed and slay in work and in life? Who is inspiring you?
And then ask yourself: what is one teeny tiny step I could take to seeing them more often? And, to those who didn't make the cut - perhaps slightly less? Love to see your hacks in the Slack group on this one!
Week Four: Mojo Cup
If I asked you what makes you feel full of mojo, what would you say?
Managing mojo, is just like managing anxiety or any other mental hack: it takes consistent practice. I use this hack to this day when I feel tired, flat or find myself with no plans and wondering: "hang on, what makes me feel good again?"
When we feel flat, it can seem as though nothing will help. The opposite is true: small, tiny acts help us build momentum and help us keep in a positive mindset. The previous weeks we have focussed on how we can make ourselves feel good. This week we are going to look at what external factors can help us build momentum from feeling not so fab to back to feeling like 'us' again.
This weeks task asks you to identify what energises you in the following categories:
Write down what energises you and 'zaps' your energy in each column. This can take some time to get familiar with what makes you feel good, especially if you've never sat down to do this before. As a prompter, think about the last time you felt really calm, content, and fulfilled. It could be a tiny moment doing something really small (eg sitting at a cafe), or it could be an epic moment you remember fondly (graduation, a family get together, a wedding). What were you doing in that moment? Where were you? Who, if anyone was around you?
After you've had some time to write these down, reflect on what cropped up.
- What activities, objects, people and environments have you observed don’t bring out the best in you?
- When you feel meh, what activities, people, environments or objects do you think you could immediately surround yourself with / seek out? Could that be something you do now? Today? This week?
- What can you schedule in the energising columns as a proactive step towards feeling awesome this week?
The goal of this exercise is that after scheduling in mojo making activities, or making time for those who energise us, or doing a spring clean of objects that zap our mojo, slowly it becomes habit. And once we get into the habit of feeling good - everything else becomes alot less tolerable.
I love this exercise, because as the pros say: you're never too good you don't need the practice. Feeling the mojo, the juice, the juju, your awesomest takes work. And I 100% promise you: you're worth it. Have fun with this one lovelies. x
Week Five: Saying No
Last week we asked you: what fills your Mojo Cup? What zaps it? And this week we look at how to do less of our 'zapping' tasks by flexing our No Muscle.
The trick to saying no is not making it personal. People often are under the impression we love doing what they're asking because we either say yes all the time, we look like we enjoy it, or we used to enjoy it. They're none the wiser when we keep saying no out of wanting to hurt someone else's feelings. When we say no with politeness and care, we're on our way to freeing us from zapping activities and helping the other person find the right fit for what they're after.
Take a look at last week's 'what zaps my mojo' list. Grab your Mojo School accountability partner and ask if you can role play saying no with them using the No Sandwich structure:
- Validate: us humans crave validation and when we feel like someone has heard us, we're less likely to take rejection personally. Let the person you've heard them and that you value them. Examples include: "I hadn't thought of that before", or, "Sounds fun!" (If you do like the idea but can't make it), or even "thanks for asking me" is a small step in letting them know you value them.
- No without emotion: the less details we give people the less there is for them to argue with. "As it turns out, I can't do that / I'm not free", or "no can do, I'm afraid!", or "I'm currently at capacity".
- Change topic / opportunity here's where you talk about what you want to do more of to see if they'd be on board with that. You're in contact with this person as you either work with them or you're in a friend group, so it's highly likely you'll want to hang out with / see them again at work. Change the topic to something you do want to do, or do them a solid and ask questions to help them identify people who could help them with the ask.
The good news saying no is easier than you think! It can feel icky at first, but once you practice and see the results - it's hugely liberating. Practice it with your accountability buddy, or, another Mojo School student by asking if someone wants to practice in Slack. Good luck and know that it's something everyone finds tricky, too.
Week Six: Planning to Slay
Education experts say we learn most through articulation and reflecting on what we have learned. We're more likely to take positive change and alter habits when we've articulated what has been holding us back, what we have learned through the process and build our confidence by aligning our belief systems with our perceived capabilities. In other words: by focussing on small actions towards the things that energise us: we start to feel our mojo return and feel more like the best version of ourselves.
Now it's time to reflect on the tiny edits you are going to continue to rock in your elevated mojo life. You've done the work by focusing on a small edit every week. It's the small steps that add up to big ones.
Fill in this form outlining what conclusions you've come to and we'll post it back to you to refer back to to help you continue to slay and so you can remind yourself just how far you have come - and how far you will continue to go.
Can't wait to see what you are going to commit to and CONGRATS!